Friday, June 17, 2011


I could masterbate on the streets here in India and not get judged. That's how free this place is. Count it.

I've come to realize that the difference between home and this place is that the people here are more "free" than any group of people I've ever seen. Even more free than the bitches I've seen walk into Mac's and walk out with someone. That's real talk.
The things I've seen here in the past three weeks is the most amazing things I've ever seen in my 30 years on the third rock from the sun. I'm not talking about how cheap things are - I've been living off of the same $200 I came with. I'm not talking about how the company paid for me to get here and live. I'm talking about how Americans can be the most arrogant, self-assured people on the planet.
Tell me that someone in Arlington can walk out the door and pee on the side of the road without judgement from people like me who see it and think they're dirty but no one else would. Tell me that someone in Texas can walk up and down the middle of the street and only get a honk from a moving car, making sure you don't walk in front of it and get hurt. Tell me someone in Dallas you can wear the same shirt, 35 days in a row, buttoned down to the third button, showing all sorts of smelly body hair and no one but ME will judge you on the smell of onions and corn chips when you walk in.
I took video of my way to work the other day finally.
If you notice at the beginning, there is a dude in white, relieving himself on the side of the road. it is 8 in the morning, folks. Eight. Which either means he is a G and has a penis the size of a ficus tree or he doesn't care who's watching. That nigga is free. And letting it go freely. All out in the open like "the world is my urinal". That's what I'm talking about. I get nervous peeing at freaking Boomer Jacks in a trough! My only saving grace there is melting the ice. And this fool pulled over his rickshaw and let it all hang out and just went, man. If that ain't free, I'm not a mexican with bad credit.
We, as Americans, have lived in the microwave age for so long that we demand results right away. The people here are so un-time aware that I'm the only one in the room wearing a watch. And I bought this hoe from a fool on the side of the road who OBVIOUSLY didn't worry about time. He didn't worry about time so much that the second hand on my watch is slower than Tom Cruise realizing that he is a homosexual.
Rode down the street the other day and came upon a young man and his sister sitting on the side of the road. Something was odd about what they were doing so I just kept watching. As we came upon them in the wild driven hotel cap, I noticed that the little man was playing with his "little man" on the side of the road as the little girl watched.
Now. You can't tell me that if some little nigga was on the side of the road in Ft Worth, tugging at his Vienna sausage wouldn't get arrested for that mess. If I can't live in a world where some dude can't discover that touching his one-eyed pleasure snake makes him giggle, then I just don't want to live. Hell, his pecker with bigger than mine! Who knew.

Anywayz... with a "z".

I'm now at the hotel, drinking the $100 bottle of Jack with 7 Up. I would say "don't judge me", but I know better. Shit is free at the hotel!

Until next time...

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